In Partial Defence of Daniel Bonkers-Bananas

ONCE upon a time in Queensland, it was a given imbibed with the Four-ex and mangoes on which we breakfasted that it was our destiny to be the butt of jokes forever, especially from the covetous guerrillas the Premier called “southern socialists.” It wasn’t all comedy about Joh Bjelke-Petersen’s syntax – which nobody imitated better than Gerry Connolly – or his odd enthusiasms (like, er, the possibility of using hydrogen as a fuel). There was also the spying and brutality of Special Branch, bans on protesting, the routinised framing of political enemies and the fact that Queensland’s only crime commission – The Joke – commissioned crimes. Sunshine Staters are therefore grateful for the rise and crazy notoriety of Daniel Andrews. Few Premiers, if any, have ever inverted a cultural axis of Australian politics in quite the same way. In Joh’s day, his beloved state was derided as the Deep North but now the redneck corruption, the violent cops, the segregation and the sheer Huey Long wrongness of it all is located where it should be: in the Deep South.

Even so, with scores of people from all sides, parties and professions condemning the Spring Street Caudillo for his new blitzkrieg on the rule of law, something is not getting the attention it deserves. Namely: Mr Andrews isn’t entirely to blame. He has remained popular throughout the covid crisis and is thought to be on track to win re-election. Unlike old Joh, the Victorian Premier doesn’t need a gerrymander. What does that say about the voting public – especially in greater Melbourne? The more pummelled they are, the more loved and protected they feel. Scare campaigns aren’t new and they’re not hard. Paul Keating successfully depicted the featureless John Hewson as Idi Amin in a Ferrari. But what we’re seeing in Victoria has no precedent. It doesn’t matter how many times Mr Andrews’ critics bring him in for questioning on suspicion of battery, his masochistic spouse – the electorate – is parked outside the station waiting to drive him home.

And yet… while this profoundly strange black and blue coupling may not have a precedent, it does have several equals. All the other Premiers have behaved in exactly the same manner, give or take several degrees of fanaticism. I never bought into that Sky-driven lionisation of Gladys Berejiklian as the Good German of the group. She panicked like all the others, traded rationality for culpability management and frequently rivalled her southern counterpart for cruelty and stupidity. We don’t know for certain why Victoria’s “case” and fatality numbers are so much worse than anywhere else. The one factor sufficiently long-running and idiosyncratic to be examined as the key difference is time incarcerated. Imprisoning a city with a virus that flourishes indoors has proved to be utterly murderous. Prove me wrong. Daniel Andrews is the worst of a bad bunch but it definitely is a bad bunch. More than any of the others, however, he wanted to be the Great Man of History when the pandemic began. When it went bad because of his negligence, he dumped all blame on the public and is probably as surprised as anyone that they worship him for it.

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25 Responses to In Partial Defence of Daniel Bonkers-Bananas

  1. rosie says:

    I’m not convinced about the worshipping but nevertheless Victoria as a whole had gotten everything they voted for.
    Everything
    East West link cancelled at a cost of one billion
    Partial birth abortion
    Euthanasia
    The criminalising of the confessional
    Everything on the lgbt wish list including gender fairies (books) at kindergarten
    Rising taxes, punitive fines
    The list is endless.
    I can’t gauge the mood of the electorate, the few I speak to seem anti dan, those i see online that supported covid zero are also angry.
    The ‘worst’ is concentrated in the north west, that might just be because we have the best multiculturalism.

  2. Tel says:

    Build Backwards Bananas!

    I never bought into that Sky-driven lionisation of Gladys Berejiklian as the Good German of the group. She panicked like all the others, traded rationality for culpability management and frequently rivalled her southern counterpart for cruelty and stupidity.

    She confidently said there would be no lockdowns, and then imposed a harsh lockdown in August with a clear intent of extortion … telling us vaccines make us free. This out of character flip flop smacked of outside influence … then we have had a whole row of extraordinary resignations from NSW Parliament, including Gladys herself. Something weird sure happened there, not saying I know what it was, but just perhaps ICAC saved our collective backsides.

    I would love to know the real reason for those resignations.

  3. Not Trampis says:

    well the worst thing about Joh was the gerrymander. You cannot argue about the ALP being in government.

    If everyone was incarceration then covid would not spread as the virus needs to spread from person to person. clearly they did not occur in Melbourne or Sydney.

    The lockdowns merely kept the virus down to levels that were manageable.
    for a start without them the health sector would have blow up

  4. Buccaneer says:

    The health system did blow up, in Vic and Qld anyway. How else can you describe the insane queues in vic and the inability to deal with even 6 covid cases in qld. One of the true scandals in this whole palaver is exactly how poorly run publicly owned health facilities perform when under the gun. Not to mention how badly organized the testing was in Victoria. Dan needed to lock down so hard because he’s a simpleton incompetent.

  5. Boambee John says:

    Non Compos Mentis just luurrrrves drinking the Kool-Aid. I hope that he has not set foot outside his home since June, we cannot afford to lose such a source of amusement.

    PS, unfortunately, the standard of punctuation has again declined, and some confusion with words has set in. “If everyone was incarceration”???

    PPS, the Queensland Gerrymander was originated by the ALP long before J B-P came along.

  6. Davey Boy says:

    in a corner of the corporate world I once inhabited, where the firm ran branches in every State and territory of this once-Federation, the Vic staff were always making sure that they were seen to be and indeed prided themselves as being ‘more progressive’ than the employees elsewhere, never missing a chance to boast about or demonstrate their perceived superiority. It’s a mindset many Vics seem to share. Hubris. Always comes before the fall.

  7. Lee says:

    PS, unfortunately, the standard of punctuation has again declined, and some confusion with words has set in. “If everyone was incarceration”???

    Someone like NT, who can’t cope with the basics of grammar, spelling, and punctuation is best ignored.
    Then there is his deep and profound ignorance generally.

  8. rosie says:

    No surprise that Andrews was previously health minister.

  9. Lee says:

    No surprise that Andrews was previously health minister.

    And as with every else he turns his hand to, a very poor one.
    Typical Labor Party, failure and incompetence gets you promoted.
    Just ask KKK.

  10. Not Trampis says:

    Yes everybody knows the ALP started the gerrymander but it was Joh who became premier ( because his party had more of the seats). with about 19% of the vote.

    If you think the hospital system blew up during a lockdown then it would have been far worse without it.
    Unfortunately Le neither you or anybody else has come closed to showing that. you and the deplorables have though on many subjects not the least this one.

    Remember saying a man who had a heart attack did not die of covid. what about the myth that those who have two jabs can spread covid as much as the unvaccinated.

    You cannot make that up.

  11. Lee says:

    You cannot make that up.

    Yet you do it all the time.

  12. Shy Ted says:

    SARS Cov2 virus still not isolated, therefore cases = 0, deaths = 0.

  13. Shy Ted says:

    Still no valid test. Lies = 100%.

  14. Boambee John says:

    Lee

    Someone like NT, who can’t cope with the basics of grammar, spelling, and punctuation is best ignored.
    Then there is his deep and profound ignorance generally.

    He seems to be some sort of minor academic at Macquarie Uni. Your (and my) tax money at (some form of) work.

  15. Boambee John says:

    Non Compos Mentis

    Yes everybody knows the ALP started the gerrymander but it was Joh who became premier ( because his party had more of the seats). with about 19% of the vote.

    Is it your big complaint that J B-P was better at the Gerrymander than those who actually established it? And established it long before J B-P entered Queensland politics. They couldn’t even do corruption properly!

    PS, I realise that you are a bit slow, but he became premier in a Coalition, with collectively much more that “about 19% of the vote”. For some strange reason, the ALP routinely referred to him as “Mr 26%” rather than “Mr 19%”. Probably because they used the same counting system as they used for tallying membership numbers.

  16. Boambee John says:

    Silly Non Compos Mentis still using the “you and the deplorables” petty insult.

    He/she/xe is too historically ignorant to comprehend that such insults usually become badges of honour. The Kaiser referred to the BEF of 1914 as a “Contemptible Little Army”, the veterans proudly called themselves the Old Contemptibles. Lord Haw Haw referred to Australian soldiers besieged in Tobruk as “Rats in a trap”. Those veterans proudly called themselves the Rats of Tobruk.

    And so it goes with the petty insult “Deplorables”. But I’m sure it sounds really, really, condescending when Non Compos Mentis uses it in the faculty lounge.

  17. Boambee John says:

    Non Compos Mentis

    what about the myth that those who have two jabs can spread covid as much as the unvaccinated.

    You cannot make that up.

    Indeed I cannot. It was medical authorities who “made that up”.

  18. Not Trampis says:

    no it was made up here via the daily Mail.
    no-one here had the understanding of what the implications of this absurd statement meant.
    too many too proud of their ignorance.

    Gerrymanders are bad anywhere. Gordon Chalk could not believe the liberals could get a substantially larger vote than the Nats but still be the the smaller party in government.

  19. Rex Anger says:

    m0nty, if you are out there:

    Pleeeeeease come back and be the leftwits’ Mouth of Sauron for us Cats once again.

    Your replacement Homer Paxton is utterly incompetent and appalingly stupid…

  20. Ed Case says:

    but it was Joh who became premier ( because his party had more of the seats). with about 19% of the vote.

    Joh’s Party was in Coalition with the Liberal Party when they won 19% of the vote [1969].
    The reason was that the then Country Party didn’t stand in any Brisbane, Ipswich, Toowoomba, Rockhampton or Townsville electorates where the Liberals stood.
    That meant they only had the opportunity to win votes in 38% of the seats, yet they still won 19% of the Total Statewide vote.

  21. Boambee John says:

    Non Compos Mentis

    no it was made up here via the daily Mail.
    no-one here had the understanding of what the implications of this absurd statement meant.

    If you genuinely believe that, then you need to widen your range of reading matter. And do try to punctuate your babble correctly. It doesn’t amke it any more accurate, but it will look better.

    Gerrymanders are bad anywhere.

    But not worthy of criticism except when done by the Nationals, who simply adopted a ling standing ALP practice, and did it better. Is it the “did it better” that rankles with you? Perhaps you could offer some criticism of the South Australian Gerrymander that kept the ALP in government there for years after they were getting well under 50% 2PP?

  22. Boambee John says:

    Ed

    The reason was that the then Country Party didn’t stand in any Brisbane, Ipswich, Toowoomba, Rockhampton or Townsville electorates where the Liberals stood.
    That meant they only had the opportunity to win votes in 38% of the seats, yet they still won 19% of the Total Statewide vote.

    Please don’t bother Non Compos Mentis with facts, they make his brain hurt. The very idea that the Nationals might have got half of the votes they actually contended for will be too much for his tiny intellect.

  23. Ed Case says:

    Checking Wiki’s entry on the 1969 Qld State Election, the photo of Bjelke is current for 1969, the photo of ALP leader Jack Houston [b. 1915] is current for about 1937.
    Bottom line:
    it took 6,000 voters to elect a Country Party Candidate, 11,000 for a Liberal Candidate, 12,000 for an ALP loafer, and 61,000 for a Queensland Labor Party member [Tom Aikens].
    So, yeah, there was a Gerrymander, but that’s not the reason Labor were in the woods for 32 years.

  24. Ed Case says:

    Rehashing the ALP Split of 1957, Nicklin was advised not to support Gair on Supply, yet looking back his decision ended the best Government Queensland ever had, when most of the Cabinet were defeated.
    That’s the real reson Labor were out in Qld for 32 years, the replacements were deadbeats and no hopers.
    Something to consider for those calling for the Morrison Government to be destroyed at the Polls.

  25. Entropy says:

    The Qld health system has been in crisis well before Covid hit.

    The original trouble was a cost saving measure/ doctors union bit of bull in the Beattie/Bligh days which claimed it was better to centralise in inner city specialist hospitals and not build or upgrade new outer surburban ones. Apparently in the future, you would be treated at home. Of course, now we are in the future, it was seen fir what it was: political bullshit.

    Under the Newman and the Borg, services actually improved, especially emergency, with a big drop off in wait times and shorter times for elective surgery. Everyone was surprised, but that is a fact.

    Since Palaszczuk got in there has been a quite large recruitment drive in QH, but it seems to have been mostly management and corporate, and the sisterhood nurses taking over allied health with subsequent downgrades in delivery there. Lording over OTs, dieticians speechies and demanding endless extra reports sure beats cleaning bedpans I suppose.

    Anyway, now multi hour ramping of ambulances is widespread, you can spend hours in emergency before being seen, and they can forget you. The other strategy is to park one in a wheelchair in a corridor, or if lucky, an examination room, and leave you there. Bring your own food and drink though, because they don’t think of those needs. In Queensland, you should pay for private emergency if you can.

    Now imagine if there were 1500 people in Covid wards in the system. It cannot, will not, be able to cope.

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